Crossroad

I go left,

I go right,

I go back to the centre.

Confused, speechless.

I want to move forward,

But, where do I start?

Stand with a dull sceptre?

Or gain freedom with darkness?

Calamianes Playlist

Let me share my playlist when I went on a solo backpacking journey in the Calamianes Group of Islands in northern Palawan, the Philippines.

A Day of Silence

When I get bored inside the classroom, my mind wander to places and times of different setting. Like what others would normally do, I also draw or write whatever is on my mind. But I do as weird as performing simple mathematical equations.

Here is the poem written on a photocopied lecture on Science, Technology and Society.

It’s a day of silence!

And they got the whole world in their hands

Trouble is fuzzy

Happiness is on the clear sky…

And I am below the ground of darkness.

Broken Breath

Brought the sun right through my eyes
Eroded the painful rust of my life
Rode the waves, rendered my heart to dry
No reasons left to cry

Asked my heart for what you have
Decided for a love to save
Estimated the love I could give
Tried to add what you could sieve

Tried to forget you for the better
Elevated my life not higher
Brought the sphere of loneliness
Undoubtedly pulled out happiness

Excavated future in my mouth
Nourished the cold lights of the south
Trusted my fate to the thread-cutter
Illogical to call it a form of surrender

Extended my sense to see the situation
Meagerly tried not to do pain-initiation
Pleased myself with nothing
Opposed what life has set.

I Secretly Love You

19 February 1999. There must have been too much cheese in my burger meal on that day.

The day I met you
No other feelings inside
Just a feeling that’s true
For a friend on my side

You’re precious, that’s no lie
Always here when my life runs dry
And in times when I can’t help but cry
You wipe tears in my eye

I wish to be close to you
And I hope you feel the same way, too
But I’m afraid to confess all of these
Pain might strike my chest

For I know, you love me just as a friend
Don’t know if you could trace another end
Is that love that my heart can see
Or just the way I want it to be

Days have passed by thinking of you
I don’t know if I could tell you
That I have learned to care for you
That I secretly love you

I promise to keep it ‘till the end
If I could not, send me to the edge
But I fear the moment you go
Without even telling you, “I love you.”

A million thanks to the owner of the photo.

Batanes – Paradise Found!

Very excited to take pictures at the Marlboro Country, Batanes.

I Just Want You To Fight For Me

Real Steel is one of those few films that contain surprises. It was never promoted as a father-and-son movie. It was marketed as a movie on robots and boxing. Do not ask me why I love the movie even more than the Transformers 3.

The scene wherein Charlie tries to save Max from falling into the deep wasteland of abandoned robots is probably the turning point of the film (for me). After that, I was turned to a child waiting to receive lollipop. I did wait for the time when Max finally calls Charlie “Dad.” And at the near-end portion of the film after the fight with Zeus, Max finally dropped the bomb. He was yelling “Dad! Dad!” after his brief stint with the microphone.

The main reason, maybe, why it was not marketed as a father-son movie is to lure as many members of Adam tribe as possible into watching and let them realise on their own that thing called “fatherhood.”

And of course, observe yourself when watching the scene wherein Max tells Charlie, “I just want you to fight for me!” See the stars if they align towards the goodness of your heart. If you cannot feel an emotional thing-y, then try to get a knife and see if you bleed when you cut your wrist. If you can see blood, then congratulations! You still have a heart, only with no accessories.

I’ll Carry You

When you fall asleep, I will carry you to your bed.

Do not be afraid because I won’t be leaving you.

I’ll stay…

(Image from the movie “Drive” starring Ryan Gosling as the Driver.)

Life, According To Three Idiots

I never doubted my capacities, but sometimes, I fail. Situations just plainly ignore me and turn me against what I believe in and stand for – a happy life. When things get wrong, I swagger in the road of life and mess up everything. I become a peg that cannot get out from where it was stuck into. 3 Idiots showed me a revitalised trick on how to win over the easily-frightened thing called Heart. Rancho gave a piece of advice to his friends when everything’s become fuzzy – just utter ‘All is well’ – and this, yes, does not solve a problem, but gives you the courage to face it.

In a fictional Imperial College of Engineering in modern-day India, everything in life is determined by their success in this school. Luckily enough, Fahran, Raju and Rancho (who are basically the three idiots) were accepted as students of ICE. In development studies and perspectives, all groupings or communities give rise to their own set or sets of elites. In the school, being on top is accorded by the School Director (who looks like Einstein). His position and elitism are all, but tapestries of fear and educational terrorism.

Scanning all the subplots will reveal a Rancho who lives to change the world he lives in. His deeds and actions might be tagged as rebellious, as he is known to be coming from a rich family (which are all pure lies, which you will learn towards the end of the film). His ideals in life are quite new and not-so-traditional. But through these, he gets through his daily life with doses of excitement, contentment and gladness. His passion for life is generously emitted and shared to his two friends. He convinces his friend Fahran to follow what he really wants to be in life – to become a wildlife photographer. He tells his other friend, Raju, to live not in fear. For many instances in the film, he is able to demonstrate his capability and personality as a true friend amidst good and bad times of their lives. The friendship he shares with Raju and Fahran is unquestionably sincere, definitive and heartwarming.

His love for Pia forms a significant plot on the story. It is not really the love-at-first-sight type sprouted from the best seeds that Cupid can offer.

One of the realities that really struck me is suicide among students. Students commit suicide if they fail at the last minute. Movies can portray it as extreme as blaming it to rotten educational systems. More and more students kill themselves for nonsense reasons and the most apparent of these is that they could not graduate. Yes, being not able to graduate is really frustrating, especially when you think that you have moved with the green traffic light. Statements like “I quit” are alarming as the world becomes more and more competitive and flooded with graduates of the highest qualification from high-calibre universities. I think, the world has stopped focusing on the humane side of existence. Bosses (including teachers) are focused on the tempting idea of propagating citizens of over-the-edge abilities. People failed to realise that life is not all about numbers and competitions or acquired skills. We forget that life is life. No one or nothing can define it. If life has no life, then it’s no life.

Filipino Horror Movies

Filipino filmmakers are good in making drama films, especially family-related stories. They could probably be one of the best in the world. Love stories and romantic comedy films are also one of their specialisations. Lengthening scenes of heart-wrenching conversations, crying moments and realistic arguments are always effective, making the whole theatre experience a memorable and one-of-a-kind treat.

However, dragging scenes in horror, suspense or thriller films is irritating and totally vexing. They always reflect dumb and senseless Filipinos. I cannot understand why writers or directors need to lengthen scenes in these genres, as opposed to what they really should be to cope up with how the heart should beat in similar situations. Imagine horrifying imageries psychologically enwrapping your existence in a situation that produces faster heartbeats but your mind cannot completely tell your heart to do it because of poor storyline and logical failure.

For instance, near the end of the movie entitled Patient X (directed by Yam Laranas), Lucas has to go away with a young girl from a hospital where they are in because they are being hunted by an aswang. Your heart, as the audience, is also beating fast because your mind virtually put you in the same situation. You want to get in the car and drive away from that place because you still would like to see the sunrise. Then, all of a sudden, Lucas moved out of the car and went back to the hospital.  The excitement went on a downfall spree. I do not know what was the writer thinking when he wrote that part. Why did Lucas go back? To tell the aswang that they are going away? Inside, he found a bleeding Dr Jack, who died after walking and falling into his arms. Everything seemed to be frozen; Lucas was given the time to close his eyes and cry. He forgot that the young girl was waiting inside his car. He was reminded when the child screamed because the aswang was there, trying to get her.

Even Star Cinema, known for good drama and tearjerker films, is found guilty of dragging scenes in their horror films. For example, in the episode Braso of the film entitled Cinco, there were three young men put in a morgue for their final initiation in joining a fraternity. While they were in the morgue, they learnt that there was a moving arm. I could not understand why Ivan, who had been scared since the start of the episode, had to move backwards to the darker portion of the room while exclaiming “Braso?!” It could have been better if they let him stood still. And how can he check what is moving behind the stacked bottles when the room is supposed to be dark? On the other hand, in the episode Mukha, does Rizza need to go back inside the building when something strange is happening right before her eyes? The episode Mata is also annoying because Rose was portrayed inconsistently. She was built strong but her characterisation was weak. The premise of the episode is repetition of the scenes until something has been reached. Rose suspected that déjà vu was happening to her at the second repetition, but just let things to happen.

The greatest failure is the series Shake, Rattle & Roll of Regal Films, which has been doing it for many years. Eleven films have been produced so far. In the Diablo episode of the eleventh film in the series, it was not shown in the film that Jake has poor eyesight. When he was investigating what fell in front of his car, he needed to get near the item, close enough for his nose to touch that something. This was similarly done in the Lamang-Lupa episode wherein the policeman had to move closer to find what was coming out of the stomach of Shiela. That thing was big enough not to be seen by the naked eye.

Some horror and suspense-thriller films were excellently written and done. These include Feng Shui, Sukob (this is the current highest-grossing Filipino horror), Signos, Siquijor: Mystic Island, Nasaan Ka Man, Puso episode of Cinco and Lihim ng San Joaquin episode of Shake, Rattle & Roll Y2K.